Wow it has been a while since I have done this. I need to start doing this more if I don't I will forget, I did for get some things on here already. Well to start I should explain that I have 3 children now and they are now 6 almost 7, 3 and a half, and 19 months old. Carolyn, Nathan and Ashley my baby.
I am so sure you have never heard this from at least one of your parents before "I hope that you have one that is just like you!!!!" Well played mom and dad well played. Nathan is that child and since I believe my brother is not going to have kids it all came down on me. You know that child that I am talking about the one that doesn't listen does what he wants and always gets into trouble. I think God had a sense of humor giving him to me because I believe he only gives us what we can handle. You know I never asked for patience I thought I had enough already...... well Nathan has proved that wrong. He is the one that gets the blame for everything that goes wrong in the house not just by the other children either his dad also does this and 99.9% of the time it is correct. Don't get me wrong I love him dearly and he has these eyes that would melt the heart of anyone on the planet and a very sweet disposition. He loves to give hugs and kisses and is very loveable. Then there are days when all of a sudden there is silence and you start to worry because of the quiet usually it is him sleeping but I know better about these things and go check.
There was a time in my life when I was babysitting with my sister and we were eating lunch and the kids were supposed to be playing in their room. All of a sudden it got really quiet, too quiet really so Angie and I decided to check on them. As we walk out of the kitchen and into the living room we see the kids having fun in a pile of board game pieces. I am talking monopoly, clue, scrabble, risk, stratigo and more monopoly money flying in the air as if they had wings and it were windy houses being used and stepped on risk figures using the houses. Then as we see the mess their mom comes in the door takes one look and bursts out laughing. Mean while I am holding my breath and thinking ahhhh what am I going to do how is this going to be explained????? Well we told her exactly what we were doing and she was so cool with it, she laughed, and said they are kids just remember that these things happen when they get quiet. Yeah I remember Nathan reminds me almost daily now, sometimes leaving me panicking.
Penis...... yes I said it and that is how Nathan says it too. I don't want them to feel funny using the proper word for their private body parts so all 3 of them have or are learning that. Since Nathan has potty trained he has begun to play with it and is not shy about it either. One day last week he found that his underwear had a "special" hole in them for his penis. Well that was awesome to him. (I babysit too and the girl I watch was here she is 10.) The next thing I know I hear Nathan start to sing "I have a penis! Look at my penis!!" with his penis sticking out the "special" hole. In the room with him was myself, my hubby, my daughters and the girl I babysit. We all bust out laughing it is so cute it was funny. Now I know I shouldn't have but I couldn't help it. He is my dads grandson there is a story that goes with this but it is inappropriate.
Potty...... when Nathan has to go he takes me with him I don't know why he does (I think he likes the company) anyway he was done and I had to go. So I went. I came out of my bathroom and was walking in the kitchen and noticed that the trash needed to go out. So I thought nothing of it and grabbed it up and took it out and that is when I saw him a streak of white flash runs by and I realize that it is Nathan with nothing on I mean NOTHING......... GET YOUR BUTT IN THIS HOUSE NOW!!!! and as I was yelling at him to do so I hear laughing. (Oh great the neighbors just saw this they are probably thinking holy crap that is funny.)
Fart....... Oh dear Lord Please let him be silent, this as I sit down at church. I have no idea what gave him gas but it was there and he has a habit of letting me know and asking me if I heard it.
Now when I think of the word fart lots of stories come to my mind. Most of them being the stories that my grandma tells of my mom. On her first day of school her teacher asked the class if they had any questions. My mom raises her hand and asks "Can we fart in class?" Yep that's my mom. She proudly admitted that too with a huge smile on her face. Another one that I remember is when she was a little older and her teacher again asked a question again. The question was "Does anyone have a song that they would like to sing?" My mom's hand goes up, the teacher calls on her and she sings "Beans beans the musical fruit the more you eat the more toot the more you toot the better you feel so you should eat beans with every meal."
So as we are going through our Sunday meeting we are at the end and everyone has their head bowed for the closing prayer. Suddenly my hilarious nightmare begins. From across the room I hear movement and instantly know Nathan is going to be irreverent. As I look up he looks straight at me with a big grin on his face and says "did you hear? Mom did you hear it I farted mom. Mommy I farted did you hear me? Mom I farted" As he is saying these words I look at my husband who has his hand across his face hiding his snickering I look across the room at my friend who is close to tears and snickering and trying to hide it as well and so were her daughters. At first I was horrified and then looking at those two laughing I lost that and it was replaced by me snickering. After the long winded prayer was over I walked over to my friend and she asked "did he say what I thought he said?"
"Yep he did now you know why I don't sit in the chapel." Then we both started laughing. He is my mom grandson for sure. :) I just wish she could have been here to see him in action.
Garlic salt and pepper..... When I was little around 4ish I wanted to go snowmobiling really really bad. It was the middle of summer though and there was my problem, well I had a brilliant idea (although my mom would disagree later) the laundry soap :) it was white and fluffy and smelled great so I grabbed the box and took it outside and pored it all over the deck (it was a huge deck too at least it was to me.) I went back into the house and took my mom by the hand and said look mom it snowed. Big smile on my face I was so proud of myself and then I saw her expression change she wasn't happy about this and I couldn't sit for 2 days. :)
I was on the computer checking my facebook account. Nathan was supposed to be watching a movie (Cats VS Dogs was on.) All of a sudden I hear "pppllltttt oww it burns mommy I want water can you get me water?" I was like what the heck. So I got up and looked at him and on his chin was little back specks. I go into the dining area and on my kitchen floor is a powdery substance, I could smell garlic and I knew that he had gotten into my brand new shaker of garlic salt. It was everywhere, I walked to the laundry room where we keep the litter box, as I walk into the room I smell the pepper (also a brand new shaker) and the reason for his pain it is all over the laundry room in the litter box and all over the clothes. "I want water mom" I looked at him and said "no Nathan you won't get any relief from the water." I put him in time out and cleaned up the mess. Yep he is my son.
The sad part is this is only what has happened this past week. Today he got me up a little before 7 am this morning so I got up came out to the living room with him turned on the Disney channel and fell back to sleep in the chair. I woke back up on and off. I see Nathan come back into the living room and he says to me "Mommy I just went pee" I thought, "Yay he went in my bathroom and used the potty." Uh em yeah no. I went to use my bathroom and looked in the laundry room and my eyes went to the litter box. Cats when they pee are centered in one spot. Well it looks as if someone pored something into it. I found where he peed :( I think my cats are going to be upset. So this is the life with Nathan this week. Onto the next.
